I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize