Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
