its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Randomize
