I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
