He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
