Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
