So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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