Only a mothe r could love this liver
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
