i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
