He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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