Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
