Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize