yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
