is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
it was like eating out sand paper
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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