I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
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