a queef is a wish your heart makes.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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