I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Every concussion has its silver lining
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
