Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
