One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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