11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
