It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Someone came in the potted fern
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Randomize