There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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