do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Randomize
