your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
