Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
