I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Randomize