no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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