if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Randomize
