Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
