New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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