i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize