Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
