Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
bring money and cleavage
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize
