Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
