Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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