Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(512): View more from Texas

Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself

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(504): View more from Louisiana

Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.

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(718): View more from New York

Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.

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(812): View more from Indiana

Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.

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(530): View more from California

tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner

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(914): View more from New York

i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture

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(541): View more from Oregon

The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."

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