Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
