whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
