when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Randomize
