don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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