if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Small penises have feelings too.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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