I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
