Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
