I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
