All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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