Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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