STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
