Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Im part way to drunk.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
