No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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