what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
